I used to think men were either born attractive, or they were out of luck. Like many of my friends, I had a limiting belief that women were only attracted to men who are physically good looking. This limiting belief may have been due to the fact that men place such a high value on looks, but the truth of the matter is that women are much less shallow creatures than men when it comes to this issue. (I know, I know…there are exceptions).
Don’t get me wrong, there is no doubt that a well dressed, well groomed look is a great way of generating attraction. However, there are MANY other things that are MUCH more important to a woman than looks. Women are attracted to qualities such as leadership, ambition, popularity, depth, and the list goes on and on.
One of the best ways to build attraction is with Social Proof. Imagine sitting in a bar when suddenly, a man comes walking through the doors. All the heads turn to smile in his direction and someone leaps up out of their chair to greet
him. As everyone sees these events happening, their entire perspective of the man is instantly being associated to one of respect, social acceptance, and high value. That is the position you want to get yourself into when you walk through those doors.
It takes a while, but eventually you get to a point where so much of the work is done for you. You can just sit back and enjoy the show. Having a local hang out where you get to know the staff is a HUGE benefit. When the bouncer lets you in for free, or past a long line, that is Instant Value and you become respectful to people watching.
Or…imagine you in the middle of a conversation and the sexy bartender comes up, asks you if you need another drink by name, and mentions how she loved that thing you did for her last time. It is a beautiful thing, and it also raises your value. It would cause a huge attraction spike for anyone who saw.
A second benefit to having a regular watering hole is that you get to see familiar faces. You will see guys and girls that you have hung out with before. As soon as you walk in, you are saying hi to everyone and getting caught up from last time you spoke. This puts you in a talking mood and shows those around you that you are social and connected.
You are also familiar with the faces of all the waitresses. You need to have perfect strategy that wins them over bit by bit with each one of your visits. Women love to come up and talk to you when you are talking to other women! Women will always overestimate the attractiveness of the other girl and underestimate their own.
Some guys mistakenly think that, in order to attract a woman, you have to buy them drinks. I have asked tons of women if having a guy buy them a drink ever works. I have NEVER had one woman tell me it works! Not only does it convey that you are trying to buy them off or get them drunk, it also has been done TOO many times by other men. You MUST be the exception.
